Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Fruition of Hope






Hope is hard to hang onto during grief. I don't mean hope of the eternal kind, but hope that the day to day efforts have any worth. When my mom died, I had the hope of seeing her again in Heaven. What I lost there for a while was the hope that I'd get up in the morning and find it was worth the effort. What I lost for the while was both purpose, and the hope of having purpose again. (Let's face it: I make a lousy housewife.)
I lifted my voice to Heaven to ask "What is my purpose now? How can I hope to serve You?"
"Plant seeds."
What? It's the middle of February. It is still a month too early to start seedlings for the garden.
"Plant seeds."
Tomato?
"Fine."
Bob can't eat tomatoes. Maybe peppers?
"Fine."
Lettuce?
"Whatever. Plant seeds."

I was sure this was not my inner voice telling me to plant seeds, but the Holy Spirit. My inner voice would have lost patience with me. (Seriously. Have you ever read my interviews with myself?) So I went to the store and looked for seeds. Yes. They had seeds in the middle of February. I was surprised that they didn't know it was too early to start seedlings, but then figured that if God didn't know it was too early, why should Osco. I bought dirt and tomato seeds (Bob told me to go ahead and plant the tomatoes because I like them so much) and bell pepper seeds.
I took them home, planted them, and watered them about every other day. I can't say I hoped for anything yet. I just obeyed and tended the seeds I planted. Two weeks later, I saw a stem push out of the ground. I felt hope. I hoped not only that that stem would push out and one day come to fruition, but that I'd see more stems push out soon. Most of the seeds sprouted eventually, but a few didn't. For them, my hope was in vain...
Still, I had about 10 plants of each. I looked up recipes for home made tomato sauce, figuring I just might have more tomatoes than I knew what to do with. Peppers we'd eat whole. Bob can help me eat the peppers. I had hopes for these sprouted plants.
A month passed as I tended them in their little planters. May is a beautiful month. I decided that May 15 would be an excellent day to plant them in the solid earth. I placed the planters themselves outside a week earlier, hoping that getting them used to the fresh air would be healthy for them. We had a cold rain one night during that week. Half of my plants perished. For them, my hope was in vain.
I planted the surviving plants in the earth, and went for a walk. My plants looked so much smaller than the plants people bought from Osco and Home Depot and Target. They'd probably have tomatoes in late July, and I'd have to wait until August. That is okay. Maybe February wasn't too early to start the seedlings after all. By June I didn't see any flowers. I was offered a temporary job, and did not have time or energy to tend my plants so often. I looked every so often, but did not see any tomatoes or peppers. It seemed my hopes for these plants were in vain.
We went to a friend's house for a barbecue in mid July, and I noticed he had a few tomatoes. I was glad for him, and noticed he had put up a cage so the tomato plants weren't laying on the ground. While I knew I was supposed to do that, I hadn't gotten around to it. I asked Bob to get some tomato cages at the hardware store for me, and he helped me stand the tomato plants up. Several green tomatoes were growing were I couldn't see them! Tomatoes, yayy! A week later, I was eating ripe tomatoes!
In another month, maybe longer, we will be warned of first frost. I will then remove the green tomatoes from the plants. Some I may fry, some I may let ripen on the window sills in my home. The plants I lovingly cared for in February, tortured in early May, tended in late May, peeked at in June, rejoiced over in July, and reaped from in August will be pulled up by the roots before winter. In February (maybe January?) new seeds will be planted in pots and put on the window sills.

Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven--

In the meantime, there are other seeds, those of a spiritual nature, for me to plant and watch grow. Some will come to fruition, and some won't. But it is my given task to keep tending the seeds that do, hoping for the best.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Preaching the Gospel in Action: Chapter 1 in "A Hole in Our Gospel"


My friends Jason and Sarah are hosting a a book club. This week the links are on Jason's blog, next week Sarah's, etc...
The book is The Hole in Our Gospel by Richard Stearn. From reading the prologue and Chapter 1, he seems to me to be saying that as Christians, we need to act on our faith, and not just profess it. We also need to encourage others to act on faith in Jesus, and not just let stated belief be the end of the Christian walk.

I love the fact that he quotes St Teresa if Avila before the beginning of Chapter 1.
"Christ has no body on earth but yours, no hands but yours, no feet but yours.Yours are the eyes through which Christ's compassion for the world is to look out; yours are the feet with which He is to go about doing good; and yours are the hands with which He is to bless us now."

The fact that he quotes a Catholic saint implies (to me, anyway) that he recognizes her as as his sister in Jesus Christ. Sometimes Christian authors who are not Catholic go off about how Catholics believe we are saved by works (I'll explain our position on works some day if you'd like...) and therefore not really Christian, but the very fact that Mr. Stearns quotes Catholic saints (on p. 23 he quotes St. Francis of Assisi "Preach the Gospel always; when necessary use words") implies to me that he does see us as his brothers and sisters in Christ. So he and I definitely start off on the right foot early on.

I also like that he includes a Study Guide in the back. The question about what keeps me in my own little bubble was a good one for m to reflect on. The answer I came up with is that I have been willing to help, but only from a distance. I will give money or canned goods to the poor, but have I ever given my time, or myself? No. That is what contributes to the existence of my bubble, and what I think this book will be challenging me on.

Go to Jason's site this week to see other blogs who have linked up and talk about the first chapter in this book. It seems a lot of us are gleaning different things, and none of us are wrong.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Hooray for Saturday: Have a "Safe" Labor Day Weekend

It's Saturday and time for @katbrak 's

I was once this good....IN MY DREAMS!


"We can go when we want to
The night is young and so am I
And we can dress real neat from our hats to our feet
And surprise 'em with the victory cry
Say, we can act if want to
If we don't nobody will
And you can act real rude and totally removed
And I can act like an imbecile"


It's like they saw me in the supermarket or something....


Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Shooting the (Text) Messenger


Welcome to a new Helen rant, in the form of an open litter. Sit back and enjoy.

To Him Who Think Breaking Up With Someone Via Text Message is Okay:

It's not. As a matter of fact, it really makes you look bad. All that effort you put into appearing to be a responsible young man went *poof*. Your ex is over you. She was over you by the time she finished reading the text message. She was in the "same place" as you in this relationship the whole time, right up to the end.

But after a year and a half, the best you can do is to text that you don't think the two of you could make a go of it, bye? You couldn't tell her that on your date the next day? COWARD! LOSER! Yes. Loser. No, not because you broke up with a great girl. She is a great girl, but that doesn't mean she was right for you. You, sir, are a loser because this great girl would have gladly been friends with you. She liked you. She had her doubts that you and her went meant to ever walk down the aisle, but she thought you were a great guy she could still be friends with. But by disrespecting her, you lost that friendship.

You also lost the goodwill you built up with her family and their friends. They always described you as a respectful young man. Do you want to know how we describe you now? "Oh, you know Ollie... He's the one who breaks up via text message...". Yeah. Good luck if you try to date any of their friends' daughters'. Oh, and they know lots of people. And those people also know lots of people, who know people. Yeah. LOSER!

Most Sincerely,
Helen
Tomorrow we shall be back with our regularly scheduled "Pleasantly Disturbed" segment rather than just merely disturbed.