Friday, June 24, 2011

I Don't Feel Crappy Anymore!

I know.  I have such finesse with titles.    I suppose I could have started with a more positive sounding "I'm feeling optimistic", but that sounds so "Little Miss Mary Sunshinish".   I have nothing against Mary Sunshine, but I haven't been her for a long time.  If anything, I felt like I was fighting pessimism.
In the beginning,  fighting pessimism was a lot like stomping on a spider:  annoying and a little messy, but a minor blip in the day.  But for a few months  I felt like I was trying to fight a dragon with a hair pin.  But one day last week, I felt a feeling that seemed familiar that I couldn't quite name.  I nearly fell out of my chair when I realized it was optimism.  I feel optimistic that this year I will be subbing, maybe even teaching.  I feel optimistic that my test results will be fine.  I feel optimistic that I can get done what needs to be done to do what I want to do!  I admit, it's not the eager optimism of my youth, but it is a weight off of my heart.
Why?  The only thing different in my life right now is that my thyroid prescription has been increased.  (Hey, God answers prayers in interesting ways.  I prayed to feel better and be more motivated, and I got symptoms that made me feel bad enough to go see a specialist in another area who said "Hmmm... You have an underactive thyroid listed under previous conditions...   Last checked over six months ago?  Let's go with a simple blood test, first..")
What's my point?  Not much.  Just that I'm feeling really good for a change.
How are you?


Wendy said...

You didn't by any chance get video of you almost falling off your chair, did you? ;o)

Glad you're feeling better! Should we take over the world now?

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you're feeling better too, Helen. Fighting pessimism can be a full-time job sometimes, but I'm thankful for grace. I don't know how people who don't know God handle it all (seriously).

Jason said...

Congrats on feeling better!