Monday, June 23, 2008

Psalm 7

7:1 Shiggaion of David; a song which he made to the Lord, about the words of Cush the Benjamite. O Lord my God, I put my faith in you; take me out of the hands of him who is cruel to me, and make me free;

7:2 So that he may not come rushing on my soul like a lion, wounding it, while there is no one to be my saviour.

7:3 O Lord my God, if I have done this; if my hands have done any wrong;

7:4 If I have given back evil to him who did evil to me, or have taken anything from him who was against me without cause;

7:5 Let my hater go after my soul and take it; let my life be crushed to the earth, and my honour into the dust. (Selah.)

7:6 Come up, Lord, in your wrath; be lifted up against my haters; be awake, my God, give orders for the judging.

7:7 The meeting of the nations will be round you; take your seat, then, over them, on high.

7:8 The Lord will be judge of the peoples; give a decision for me, O Lord, because of my righteousness, and let my virtue have its reward.

7:9 O let the evil of the evil-doer come to an end, but give strength to the upright: for men's minds and hearts are tested by the God of righteousness.

7:10 God, who is the saviour of the upright in heart, is my breastplate.

7:11 God is the judge of the upright, and is angry with the evil-doers every day.

7:12 If a man is not turned from his evil, he will make his sword sharp; his bow is bent and ready.

7:13 He has made ready for him the instruments of death; he makes his arrows flames of fire.

7:14 That man is a worker of evil; the seed of wrongdoing has given birth to deceit.

7:15 He has made a hole deep in the earth, and is falling into the hole which he has made

7:16 His wrongdoing will come back to him, and his violent behaviour will come down on his head.

7:17 I will give praise to the Lord for his righteousness; I will make a song to the name of the Lord Most High.

God is good. I thank God for Jesus, because for His sake I will be judged as righteous instead of an evil doer. I try to do good, but then I often ruin it, becausse I discover selfish reasons in my own heart, instead of a deep and pure love for God. Jesus loves me anyway, even though He can read my heart. I wonder how many others would love me if they could read my heart. Would they still love me when they see manipulation as my true motive? Do they see it, shrug, and say to themself no one is perfect, and move on/ These are questions I never have to ask about Jesus. Thank you, Lord!

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Psalm 6

6:1 To the chief music-maker on corded instruments, on the Sheminith. A Psalm. Of David. O Lord, do not be bitter with me in your wrath; do not send punishment on me in the heat of your passion.

6:2 Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am wasted away: make me well, for even my bones are troubled.

6:3 My soul is in bitter trouble; and you, O Lord, how long?

6:4 Come back, O Lord, make my soul free; O give me salvation because of your mercy.

6:5 For in death there is no memory of you; in the underworld who will give you praise?

6:6 The voice of my sorrow is a weariness to me; all the night I make my bed wet with weeping; it is watered by the drops flowing from my eyes.

6:7 My eyes are wasting away with trouble; they are becoming old because of all those who are against me.

6:8 Go from me, all you workers of evil; for the Lord has given ear to the voice of my weeping.

6:9 The Lord has given ear to my request; the Lord has let my prayer come before him.

6:10 Let all those who are against me be shamed and deeply troubled; let them be turned back and suddenly put to shame.

"The voice of my sorrow is a weariness to me; all the night I make my bed wet with weeping; it is watered by the drops flowing from my eyes." This pretty much describes how I felt when I found out I couldn't have children, and when the operation didn't work. Thank God I had no one against me for it. My husband, mom, and others were very understanding. But it hurt. Why would God bless others and not me? This is something I still struggle with. We've looked into adoption, but being the sole care taker of my mom without any brothers or sisters, I have my doubts about whether the authorities would find me fit to be a mother at this time. I pray for the faith to accept, keep going, and find out where God is trying to lead me.

Friday, June 20, 2008

Barbie Dolls

If any of you out there loved your Barbie doll more than any other toy, I apologize in advance. You are not going to like this post. I was looking at the videos in my video bar and came across the Barbie doll video, and I was reminded of my dad. When I was a little girl, more than 30 years ago, my dad forbade me to have a Barbie doll because she "looked like a prostitute". I didn't get that at all. There was bridal Barbie, career Barbie, I'm not sure if Malibu Barbie made it out yet, but you know what I mean. I didn't see the turning tricks Barbie anywhere, so I had no idea what he was talking about. As I grew up, I could only assume that he thought she developed an unattainable figure like that because she was up to no good.
Years later, after my dad had already changed his citizenship to Heavenian, I saw a special on 20/20 which traced the origin of the Barbie doll to a doll in Austria in the mid to late 1950's which was based on a cartoon in the newspaper. I know, when we think cartoon characters, we usually think Donald Duck, not Jessica Rabbit. Can you guess what her occupation was? I'll give you a hint: it was a very, very old one. My dad might have been familiar with Austrian pop culture of that time because in 1956 he fled Hungary during the Hungarian revolution.
So when he said she "looked like a prostitute", he wasn't talking about her figure, or the way she was dressed, or the way she was always all over Ken like a spill on my kitchen floor. No, he literally meant she looked like a prostitute character back in Austria. It's amazing how a person can misunderstand a person they are really close to just because they did not ask "what do you mean by that?" It's also amazing that a video of Barbie's dressed kind of provacatively (at least in the beginning part I watched) can remind me of my dad, especially since he changed his citizenship to Heavenian about 15 years ago.
Have a great day! I hope none of you Barbie fans hate me now. It really doesn't bother me that her twin sister was a bad girl. And I'm sure she was faithful to Ken always. Her and G.I. Joe were just friends...

Psalm 5

5:1 Give ear to my words, O Lord; give thought to my heart-searchings.

5:2 Let the voice of my cry come to you, my King and my God; for to you will I make my prayer.

5:3 My voice will come to you in the morning, O Lord; in the morning will I send my prayer to you, and keep watch.

5:4 For you are not a God who takes pleasure in wrongdoing; there is no evil with you.

5:5 The sons of pride have no place before you; you are a hater of all workers of evil.

5:6 You will send destruction on those whose words are false; the cruel man and the man of deceit are hated by the Lord.

5:7 But as for me, I will come into your house, in the full measure of your mercy; and in your fear I will give worship, turning my eyes to your holy Temple.

5:8 Be my guide, O Lord, in the ways of your righteousness, because of those who are against me; make your way straight before my face.

5:9 For no faith may be put in their words; their inner part is nothing but evil; their throat is like an open place for the dead; smooth are the words of their tongues.

5:10 Send them to destruction, O Lord; let their evil designs be the cause of their fall; let them be forced out by all their sins; because they have gone against your authority.

5:11 But let all those who put their faith in you be glad with cries of joy at all times, and let all the lovers of your name be glad in you.

5:12 For you, Lord, will send a blessing on the upright man; your grace will be round him, and you will be his strength.

Lord, I don't know sometimes if I could describe myself as upright, but I ask for your blessing, and grace around me. I ask you to be my strength. Make your way straight before my face.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Psalm 4

4:1 To the chief music-maker on corded instruments. A Psalm. Of David. Give answer to my cry, O God of my righteousness; make me free from my troubles; have mercy on me, and give ear to my prayer.

4:2 O you sons of men, how long will you go on turning my glory into shame? how long will you give your love to foolish things, going after what is false? (Selah.)

4:3 See how the Lord has made great his mercy for me; the Lord will give ear to my cry.

4:4 Let there be fear in your hearts, and do no sin; have bitter feelings on your bed, but make no sound. (Selah.)

4:5 Give the offerings of righteousness, and put your faith in the Lord.

4:6 There are numbers who say, Who will do us any good? the light of his face has gone from us.

4:7 Lord, you have put joy in my heart, more than they have when their grain and their wine are increased.

4:8 I will take my rest on my bed in peace, because you only, Lord, keep me safe.

What foolish things do I give my love to ? Mystery stories. My dishwasher. My crockpot. Yes, these are good things, but do I care for them beyond their purpose? Television. Solitaire. Recipe books. Thank you, God, for good things. I'm sorry I have put these things before you.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008


expressive, timeless
writing, reading, living
God reigns benevolently powerful

I did find inspiration from Psalm 3 afterall. Granted, cinquains are not part of the contest, but I submitted it anyways. Afterall, there are at least two clerihews, and that was not part of the contest.

I was wondering if I should start a separate blog for musing about the Psalms. Originally, this blog was intended to be about whatever my mind was fumbling with at the moment I was typing, whether it was a good book I read, a recipe, or beating myself up for not sticking to a diet or a lenten promise. For the last 3 days, it seems to be about the Psalms and the poetry contest. Apparently I am CDOing. Would it be more CDO to do this in a separate blog, or less. Do I need to be less CDO about my blog? Am I still musing randomly? Oh well...


3:1 A Psalm. Of David. When he went in flight from Absalom his son. Lord, how greatly are they increased who make attacks on me! in great numbers they come against me.

3:2 Unnumbered are those who say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. (Selah.)

3:3 But your strength, O Lord, is round me, you are my glory and the lifter up of my head.

3:4 I send up a cry to the Lord with my voice, and he gives me an answer from his holy hill. (Selah.)

3:5 I took my rest in sleep, and then again I was awake; for the Lord was my support.

3:6 I will have no fear, though ten thousand have come round me, putting themselves against me.

3:7 Come to me, Lord; keep me safe, O my God; for you have given all my haters blows on their face-bones; the teeth of the evil-doers have been broken by you.

3:8 Salvation comes from the Lord; your blessing is on your people. (Selah.)

The Lord is my glory and the lifter up of my head. Wow. David said it so well. I slept and woke up because the Lord was supporting me. Wow. I'm going to keep reading this today for inspiration, but I can't see right now how I'll wrote a poem from this unless I plagarize the Bible. How amazingly timeless this imagery is. Wow..

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Psalm 2

2:1 Why are the nations so violently moved, and why are the thoughts of the people so foolish?

2:2 The kings of the earth have taken their place, and the rulers are fixed in their purpose, against the Lord, and against the king of his selection, saying,

2:3 Let their chains be broken, and their cords taken from off us.

2:4 Then he whose seat is in the heavens will be laughing: the Lord will make sport of them.

2:5 Then will his angry words come to their ears, and by his wrath they will be troubled:

2:6 But I have put my king on my holy hill of Zion.

2:7 I will make clear the Lord's decision: he has said to me, You are my son, this day have I given you being.

2:8 Make your request to me, and I will give you the nations for your heritage, and the farthest limits of the earth will be under your hand.

2:9 They will be ruled by you with a rod of iron; they will be broken like a potter's vessel.

2:10 So now be wise, you kings: take his teaching, you judges of the earth.

2:11 Give worship to the Lord with fear, kissing his feet and giving him honour,

2:12 For fear that he may be angry, causing destruction to come on you, because he is quickly moved to wrath. Happy are all those who put their faith in him.

The beginning of this Psalm got me thinking about the upcoming elections. You see, I am in a bit of a pickle. I can not vote for Obama, because he is very prochoice, and several years ago during that whole partial birth abortion debate I vowed never to vote for a prochoice candidate again.
You see, growing up, I would have to describe my household's religious affiliation as Democrat. Technically, we were and are Roman Catholic, but my family was way more in lock step with the Democrats than the Church. It's not that we were for abortion. We just blamed Republican economic policies for poor women believing it was their best option. I know, we had blinders on about other reasons, such as a social stigma for unwed pregnancy, or a woman just choosing not to be burdened with pregnancy. My point is, that while we didn't like abortion, we did not associate it with Democrats.
The whole partial birth abortion debate changed that for me. I believed that a person could believe in good faith that a fetus wasn't human during the first or second trimester, because it didn't look human. I didn't agree. I did and do believe that a fetus is human at conception, however, I saw how a person could disagree with me. I know it sounds pathetically patronizing, but I saw how someone could be honestly wrong in good faith.
But I didn't and don't understand how a half-birthed baby/fetus can be considered not human by anyone. When would these people consider the child human, when he/she had a college degree? What college? Bachelor's, Masters, or Ph'd. You see where I'm going. I could not vote for a candidate who has blinders on about the humanity of a baby. And since I believe that life begins at conception, a fetus is a baby baby, an embryo is a baby baby baby, etc.
So I can't vote for Obama. Why not McCain? The answer to that is, I don't trust him. He left his first wife, the one who waited for him while he was in the POW camp, once she became disabled. She stood by him in sickness and in health. He didn't. He cheated. He left. He remarried. If the woman who bore his children and combed his hair for so many years couldn't count on him to be faithful to her, who the heck do I think I am? I am just a voter. He can be prolife today, and prochoice tomorrow.
So why does this Psalm, which is clearly about Jesus's kingship, make me think about the elections. I don't know. Maybe because it reminds me that God is in control. Maybe it reminds me I have to pray for the leaders of my country, that they turn their hearts toward God, andt then trust Him to hear my prayer.
I can't say I think I can write a poem based on this Psalm, but I did come up with an entry inspired by Psalm 1. I already submitted it.

Jesus loves me even
though I fail so explosively
He's my truest friend.

Shakespeare it's not, but I am glad I got started. I'm going to keep trying.

Monday, June 16, 2008

Psalm 1

1:1 Happy is the man who does not go in the company of sinners, or take his place in the way of evil-doers, or in the seat of those who do not give honour to the Lord.

1:2 But whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and whose mind is on his law day and night.

1:3 He will be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, which gives its fruit at the right time, whose leaves will ever be green; and he will do well in all his undertakings.

1:4 The evil-doers are not so; but are like the dust from the grain, which the wind takes away.

1:5 For this cause there will be no mercy for sinners when they are judged, and the evil-doers will have no place among the upright,

1:6 Because the Lord sees the way of the upright, but the end of the sinner is destruction.

Wow! I don't know about writing a poem based on this Psalm, but wow. Thank God for Jesus, because without Him, my end would be destruction. Jesus gives me a clean slate, so I can be verses 1-3 instead of 4-6. Wow!

Ironic Catholic is Having a Poetry Contest

One of my favorite bloggers is Ironic Catholic. IC is the blog where I found the website for determining my blog's reading level. I know, if this is High School level, then that is pretty scary, because either I am writing Shakespearian with thees, thous, and forsoothes and don't even realize it, or High School isn't what it used to be. Anyway, IC is having a poetry contest, and I am going to try to write a poem. The last time I wrote a poem, I was in college, and that was twenty years ago. It doesn't seem all that long ago when I think about it, only when I do the math. Oh well, if I can't do it, at least I will have tried. It's okay to try and fail. It is not okay to give up before I start. Maybe I should read the Psalms for inspiration. Don't worry, I'm not going to plagarize the Bible. That would have to be a special kind of sin. I like to think of myself as special, but I don't want to be special in Hell. I'd rather be the lowest in Heaven.
Could you imagine God's reaction to someone trying pass off His work as their own? Well, I guess some do. Did you ever here the joke about the guy who died, went to Heaven, and was told by St. Peter that in Heaven, everyone is treated as equal. Well, the guy goes to the movies, where there is a long line. One guy pushes his way through and is rather demanding. The guy finds St. Peter, tells him about the situation, and says "I thought you said all people were equal in Heaven!" St. Peter says "Oh, that's God. Sometimes he likes to play doctor!" Maybe I could write a poem about that...nah, I'll stick to the Psalms. Wish me luck! Have a great day!

Saturday, June 14, 2008

blog readability test

Movie Reviews

Salami and Pasta Salad

Today I am going to my cousin's Fiftieth birthday party. I offered to bring two salads, a Three Bean Salad, and a Pasta Salad. I feel perfectly comfortable sharing this recipe, because, first of all, I found it on the website, so I know they want the recipe floating out there. Second of all, I added sliced black olives, so I changed the recipe, making it mine now. I think that legally holds up. If not then Helen Moschnossgepup is in big trouble. The people at Kraft call it Bow Tie Pasta Salad. I have made it with spaghetti, so I call it Salami and Pasta Salad.

Salami and Pasta Salad

1 8 oz package of pasta ( specifically bow tie at the website.)
1 8 oz package of hard salami (specifically Oscar Mayer at the website)
1 8 oz package of frozen vegetables, thawed ( I like California style, the website suggests Italian style)
1 4 oz package of Kraft shredded mozarella cheese
1 bottle of of Kraft Light House Italian Reduced Fat Dressing
1 can of sliced black olives

Cook pasta as directed on the package. Cut salami into 1/4 inch strips. Separate the strips. Toss all the ingredients in a large bowl and cover. Refrigerate for at least one hour, or until ready to served.

I made this recipe several times, and I really like. The main reason I am posting this is that my printed copy is looking pretty bad, and I want to make sure I know the recipe with the changes I made if the copy becomes illegible. I thought you'd like to know that because I find that recipes which become illegible are usually the best ones. Have a great day!

Poll Results

Good morning! Two people favored Animal, and one Fozzie Bear. I voted for both. Sorry, I get such a kick out of them. The poll before had one vote for comedy, one vote for crime show. If I voted, I would have voted for crime show. I didn't vote because that would have meant changing my husband's vote on the computer, and I thought the least I could do for since he checked out my blog and participated is not nullify his vote.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Creamy Bratwurst Stew

Yesterday I made this great dish called Creamy Bratwurst Stew. It was awesome. Yeah, I know self praise stinks, but I'm not really praising myself, I'm praising this cooking magazine called Taste of Home. I looked at this recipe, and it reminded me of this White Bosch (not sure how to spell it) my mom used to make when I was a kid, except she used sour cream, paprika and Polish sausage. Now, if anyone out there reading this is Polish, you probably already know how to spell the meal, and that using sour cream is cheating. You are supposed to use egg white and flour to get white bosch (as opposed to red bosch, which is made with beets and my mom had the good sense to never try to inflict beets on me as a child, making it tolerable to me as an adult now).
Anyway, my dad was Hungarian before he became naturalized (now he's Heavenian), and Hungarians add paprika and sour cream to just about everything. My dad even said a good Hungarian adds sour cream and paprika to his coffee. He would then say "I, However, am not a good Hungarian". That is why none of the recipes my mom made were traditionally Hungarian, or Polish (like my mom). My mom, bless her sweet heart, has always tried to make everybody happy. She couldn't be happy if anyone was unhappy, and would be happy making other people happy. I'm more likely to try to convince people they are happy with the way I do things, that's why I do it, so smile, like it, and be happy. But mom always went out of her way for others.
Creamy Bratwurst Stew brought back many happy childhood memories of mom, dad, and me in the kitchen, adding things to otherwise traditional dishes and making them unrecognizable. I am not going to include the recipe in my blog, because I don't think that would be fair to the Taste of Home people. I am going to readjust the recipe to make Creamy Polish Sausage Stew for Half-Hungarians next week, and will post that next week (unless the Taste of Home people come after me with a barbecue fork, and threaten to skewer me if I do, which I don't think they will). Have a great day!

Friday, June 6, 2008

Thank you, blogger

I have been trying for several days to figure out how to add a blogroll to my blog, and I couldn't do it. But now on the dashboard they give instructions for how to add this new, supposedly cooler version of a blogroll to a blog, so I have been able to add this feature, finally! Don't let the video bar on the side with a poll fool you, I figured that out while trying to add a blogroll. I am not exactly technologically savvy. My mom dropped her remote control, and now we can't even use that.
Speaking of mom, I think I might have inherited the lack of the technology chromosome from her. She never was able to master the use of the microwave, and sometimes the phone where you have to push all the buttons is a little much for her to manage. I imagine that my great great great maternal grandmother must have said "A pencil sharpener! What is wrong with a good sharp knife like my mother used?" And her grandmother must have said "A pencil! What is wrong with a jar of ink and a feather? You youngin's are getting spoiled nowadays with fancy things like pencils!". I bet that the wheel was resisted by my female ancestors for several generations.
Well, I just wanted to shout out a thank you to blogger, for coming to my aid during my time of need. I just have one question for blogger. Make that two questions. How much do you really know about me? Are you following me?

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

I'm Alive, So Alive

It is Tuesday, and I did not die of an e-mail curse. This is good news for my mom and husband, and for me, too. I suppose my doctor should be glad he didn't have to put e-mail curse as the cause of death on my death certificate. And I'm also pretty sure that Prudential Insurance company has never thought of putting in an e-mail curse clause to invalidate a policy. For someone who does not believe herself to be superstitious, I am amazingly relieved to find myself not dead. It also calls into question my culpability in my mother's disability (please see chain letters are so annoying...). If one e-mail curse is a dud, then aren't they all. Doesn't God protect me from "bad luck" or worse? So maybe that chain letter that annoyed me turned out to be a blessing, since I no longer have to be afraid of them. It is true that God works out all things for the good of those who love Him. May God be with you.