Monday, September 13, 2010

I'm a Good Customer (in More Ways Than One)

Yep! It is THAT time!

Yesterday on the twitter I promised @weightwhat that if she put up an LIF post I'd share how I terrorize stock boys now that the stores near my house no longer play music. She has today, graced us with a repost. Technically, that means I should be sticking out my tongue and posting a repost, too, because I am mature like that, but I did not stipulate any qualifications to my wondrous new LIF post besides posting the LIF blog carnival today. I should have known Wendy would play a trick on me!

Before I left for the grocery store last Wednesday, my husband asked me to get him some new razor blades. He told me to get Mach 3.
"Anything else I should know?" I asked him.
"No. Just Mach 3" was his response.

So I went to Dominick's (Perhaps they call it "Safeway" in your stretch of the highway) and loaded up my cart with stuff. I'm in the lane labeled "shaving needs". A stock boy is a few feet away working with the shaving cream, when I see that they have "Mach 3" and "Mach 3 Turbo". I know that Bob said "just Mach 3", but I'd hate to have to come back for new ones, much less the trying to get a refund for the ones I bought by mistake. So I decide to take out my dusty old cell phone with the prepaid minutes and give him a call.

Now, my old purse had a separate phone section on the outside of it, but the strap broke a couple of weeks ago, so I bought myself an inexpensive interim purse that happens to have no outside pockets. I reach into my purse and take out the cell phone and call Bob.

Bob: What's up, Helen?
HRM: Hi hon! I see they have "Mach 3 Turbo" and "Mach 3"
Bob: Just "Mach 3".
HRM: Thanks hon! Bye!
I click the phone and pick up the razors with the same hand. I place the phone in the middle of my purse and without thinking, I almost zip the purse with the razors inside! When I realize what I am doing, I scream "NO! NO! NO!" and flip the razors out of my purse, several feet in the air, and bat it into the back of my cart on its way down.

And what does the stock boy a few feet away from me do. He looks straight ahead of himself, turns in the other direction, and starts work in another aisle. If I see him this week, I intend to say to him
"About last week Wednesday.... it was me, and not you in the least. Really..."

Now, to find out how I freaked out the butcher last week, Wendy will have to write a NEW Life is Funny post next week...


jasonS said...

Ha! That is hilarious. I think good customer service would have dictated that he come to see if anything was wrong, but he was probably too scared! Thanks Helen.

Wendy said...

Sounds like you almost had a Sherri moment going there...

Anonymous said...

This is quite the funny story. It was made funnier as I read, "And what does the stick boy a few feet away from me do..." And funnier still that I pictured a stick boy and didn't even catch myself and go back until I finished the story and realized it didn't make much sense.


Kelli said...

LOL! I'd give anything to know exactly what the stock boy thought of you. I bet he still thinks of you!