Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Shooting the (Text) Messenger


Welcome to a new Helen rant, in the form of an open litter. Sit back and enjoy.

To Him Who Think Breaking Up With Someone Via Text Message is Okay:

It's not. As a matter of fact, it really makes you look bad. All that effort you put into appearing to be a responsible young man went *poof*. Your ex is over you. She was over you by the time she finished reading the text message. She was in the "same place" as you in this relationship the whole time, right up to the end.

But after a year and a half, the best you can do is to text that you don't think the two of you could make a go of it, bye? You couldn't tell her that on your date the next day? COWARD! LOSER! Yes. Loser. No, not because you broke up with a great girl. She is a great girl, but that doesn't mean she was right for you. You, sir, are a loser because this great girl would have gladly been friends with you. She liked you. She had her doubts that you and her went meant to ever walk down the aisle, but she thought you were a great guy she could still be friends with. But by disrespecting her, you lost that friendship.

You also lost the goodwill you built up with her family and their friends. They always described you as a respectful young man. Do you want to know how we describe you now? "Oh, you know Ollie... He's the one who breaks up via text message...". Yeah. Good luck if you try to date any of their friends' daughters'. Oh, and they know lots of people. And those people also know lots of people, who know people. Yeah. LOSER!

Most Sincerely,
Helen
Tomorrow we shall be back with our regularly scheduled "Pleasantly Disturbed" segment rather than just merely disturbed.

8 comments:

jasonS said...

I had plenty of girls who were friends, but I really only dated the woman who would be my wife. I'm glad because I have no idea how I would have handled a break-up or if she broke up with me. Gives me hives just thinking about it. These doofuses who can't respect women enough as human beings to have a conversation about something so important, that's pretty ridiculous and silly.

I also laughed a lot that you wrote this was an "open litter." So I was thinking that this method of break-up would only be good for cats to defecate on. :)

Helen said...

Jason, while that was a typo, I like the way you think, and am going to leave it up as "litter" because I do think it was a sh*^^y way to break up with someone.

Thanks.

katdish said...

Oh, man...

A text? Seriously? That's some kind of cowardly.

Sherri Murphy said...

Speaking of cowardly,I once broke up with a boyfriend on a tape recorder...I know. I ashamed.

Shark Bait said...

on a tape recorder?????

Shark Bait said...

And Helen - Didn't you even listen to what Jon was saying yesterday? It's not really an open letter if it's not addressed to someone famous.

Annie K said...

Lame. Just lame. (The loser, not your post.)

Wendy said...

Oh Helen. If only you could learn to express how you really feel...

And a fine Happy Birthday to you!!!